Dealing with shyness and social anxiety isn’t easy. Imagine encountering amazing opportunities but failing to make the most of them due to a lack of confidence. If you are currently going through this, don’t worry, you’re not alone. A lot of people experience the same fears, and they can be addressed through various means.
The first step is believing in yourself. It can be difficult to break out of your shell, and being shy or introverted isn’t always a bad thing. However, confidence is the key to conquering each and every day and tackling any problems that life throws at you.
Not Everyone Knows Your Story
When you walk into a bar or crowded place, remember that there’s a 95% chance no one knows you. Even though it may feel like it when you’re nervous, their attention probably isn’t on you. Everyone else, like you, is there to enjoy themselves and have a good time.
No one is there to bother you or make you feel uncomfortable, and even if you do something embarrassing, they probably won’t remember your face the next day. Sit back and enjoy your cup of coffee or glass of wine, knowing that you have just as much of a right as anyone else to be there.
If you have social anxiety or get nervous having conversations with other people, you can try practicing conversations in front of your mirror. Imagine the scene, environment, and people you are about to talk to. Before you enter the situation and have a chance to become nervous, practice how to want to portray yourself and imagine yourself full of confidence rather than anxiety.
If you’re worried about running out of conversation starters or questions to ask, you can think of some beforehand and watch yourself say them in front of the mirror. Many people do this, and it has been proven effective in developing confidence over time. The road to coming out of your shell can start with this effective practice.
When you’re intimidated by all the people around you, remember that they are just people, like you. They probably also feel some level of anxiety. It is helpful to remember that very few people are out to get you or steal your confidence. Plus, they can’t as long as you don’t allow them to.
Whenever they try to approach you for a conversation, just smile and try to be as welcoming as possible. Ultimately, meeting new people is one of the best ways to boost your confidence and help with the shell break you aspire towards.
Overcoming anxiety can feel daunting, but try taking it one step at a time by setting a goal for yourself every day. Do you want to talk to your new co-worker? Have you always wanted to speak up at a meeting? Now is the perfect opportunity to do the things you fear most. Do not strain yourself by doing all of them in a day. Set realistic goals you think you can actually accomplish, and you’ll be surprised by how your progress builds up over time.
When someone gives you a random compliment, do you feel giddy inside? Does the compliment make your day? Most people appreciate receiving compliments, but often feel too nervous to give them to other people. Give off positive vibes by giving genuine compliments to the people around you. This is also a great way to start a conversation!
Complimenting someone not only boosts their confidence, but makes you feel more confident as well. Making someone else happy is something to be proud of yourself for, and doing it regularly will help brighten other people’s lives and build your own confidence.
Master poses include poses that make you feel more powerful and confident. This may vary for each person, but generally, they are poses that improve posture and keep the muscles intact. Master or power poses can give your body its needed boost of endorphins for confidence. If you are about to have an interview or perhaps speak publicly, try doing a master pose and notice your confidence increase drastically.
Shy people tend to use their cameras less. Try taking pictures of random things, documenting and preserving memories through pictures. They don’t have to be award-worthy, but taking more photos will help you recognize the beauty in the world around you. Take pictures with yourself in them to help you realize the beauty in yourself as well. Photography is an outlet for people to destress and enhance their disposition. Start snapping photos and watch as your confidence increases.
Going to large events can be nerve-wracking, especially for introverts. After the event, their social battery is drained and they will find themselves stuck at home for weeks, not even wanting to go out for small things like groceries. As you work on building your confidence, try not to overwhelm yourself with a sudden change in habit. You may feel like you need to immediately become a social butterfly, but you can take your time and build up your tolerance for big events and crowds.
Try starting with small events. You could try going out for a cup of coffee with an old friend or planning a trip to a museum with one or two friends or family members. Once you become more comfortable with smaller events, you can start incorporating larger outings and spending time with bigger groups of people. Slowly, you’ll find that you are more confident and comfortable in various situations.
If you have grown accustomed to planning out every day, trying to be spontaneous might stress you out. Every activity or action does not always need to have a purpose. For instance, you may ask yourself, “Why do I have to go out when I just went for a grocery run yesterday?”
Going out or talking to people doesn’t have to have a purpose. Sometimes, it is absolutely fine to say “just cause.” See where the tide takes you when talking to people and socializing. You do not have to talk to someone with a clear intention in mind. It’s okay to mingle with people just for the sake of mingling.
A simple trip to the salon could be what it takes to help you come out of your shell. If you haven’t tried shaking things up before, or have always wished you could be more confident with your look, now is the time! Changing your hairstyle or usual outfit is the perfect opportunity to elevate your confidence, especially once you see a new you. You’ll find that a more confident you has been stuck in a shell and you can let that self out.
You can also upgrade your wardrobe and mix and match new colors and styles. Look for styles you have not tried before, and you’ll be shocked at how your confidence changes too.
Most of the time, confidence comes from happiness. When you’re happy with yourself and the people around you, achieving confidence will be effortless. Remember that in coming out of your shell and being confident, you do not have to force yourself into doing anything you dislike. You just have to explore your personality and the little quirks that make you unique, then go from there.