Dealing with anxiety and insecurity is never easy. One moment you’re excited and feel like you can conquer the world, go on adventures, meet new people, and spread positive energy wherever you go. But the next moment, you feel like hiding in your shell, shutting everyone out, and forgetting the world around you. It’s like a switch flips. The most annoying thing is that you don’t even know how to identify what’s causing you to feel anxious or insecure.
It’s normal to experience feelings of insecurity — after all, we’re just humans. But once these insecurities overwhelm you and turn into parasitic anxiety, they can drain your time, energy, and resources. Your mental health will suffer. Anxiety is just as overwhelming, you can feel so much going on inside your head; it builds and builds until you feel like you’re suffocating. It can make you feel helpless, alone, and vulnerable, and makes you doubt yourself. Even though anxiety is bad, it can be helpful to remind yourself that the things you’re nervous about may not happen in the future. Even though they feel overwhelming, they are only thoughts in your head.
Everyone experiences anxiety and insecurities at some level, but some can hide them or deal with them more than others. How can you learn to deal with your feelings of insecurity and anxiety? You may not like the answer, but one of the ways to finally be content and at peace is to face the circumstances that you don’t want to face. Once you overcome one obstacle, the next one will be a little easier, and the next will be even easier to face.
1. Forgive and Forget the Past
If your anxiety is caused by a dark moment in your past or a person in your life who constantly criticizes you, recognize your hurt and pain and start by forgiving that person first. They may have been struggling with their own demons and insecurities, but what they did to you wasn’t right, and they behaved unjustly. You feel justified in clinging to your anger towards them. However, holding on to feelings of resentment or hatred will only hurt you and keep you tethered to that person forever. If you work through how you’re feeling and can come to a point where you forgive them, you can move on with your life and stop living in the past, feeling lighter at heart.
2. Confront Your Feelings
Your feelings and thoughts are a big part of your anxiety. Because of this, you can feel insecure about even the smallest things. If you want to overcome your feelings of insecurity, you have to confront them first. Understand what’s causing you to feel like this and start trying to accept them. Instead of running away from your feelings, face them with courage. Over time, as you continue to face similar situations, your insecurities will fade.
3. Accept Your Whole Being
Accepting yourself plays a significant role in overcoming your insecurity and anxiety. Accept the real you and love every part of yourself. Your flaws, imperfections, mistakes, and dark past are all part of what makes you who you are! Without those things, you wouldn’t be the person you are today. You may have parts of yourself that you want to change, but you cannot do so without first loving and accepting yourself as you are. Start there, learning to overcome your insecurities, before you try to change anything about yourself. Loving yourself well opens up more opportunities for you to love others even better too.
4. Practice Self-Approval
Contrary to what others think, self-approval and loving yourself isn’t being narcissistic. It’s a way for you to stop caring about what others think of you and support yourself. You don’t need everyone else’s approval just to do the things you want to do — go for it and don’t mind what others think. The most important thing is what you think of yourself and how much you approve of the person you have become. Don’t feel like you need to validate yourself so that others will accept you, because the only person that will make you feel that you matter most is you. The people who truly love you will be happy that you love yourself.
5. Stop Comparing
Comparing themselves to others is one of the main reasons that people feel insecure. All of us are made differently, with unique features, diverse skills, and individual characteristics. You don’t need to compare your physical features with those of models, wish you could get grades as good as your genius classmate, or push yourself to be in a relationship just because everyone else around you is in one. Comparison will only make you belittle and doubt yourself when you can outshine everyone with your hidden talents and unique thoughts. No one is like you!
6. Surround Yourself with Positivity
Another reason why a lot of people feel insecure is that they are surrounded by the wrong kind of peers. Battling low self-esteem will be even harder when your friends are constantly telling you that you’re not good enough. Don’t settle for poor relationships, even with friends, family members, or colleagues. If you don’t like the way someone treats you, end the relationship or avoid them, depending on the situation. You can try to talk to them about it first, but if they don’t change their negative behavior, it’s okay to leave the situation. Find people who understand you, listen to you, love who you are, and don’t pressure you to be someone you’re not. The best way to combat loneliness is to find people that bring out the best in you.
7. Trust Yourself
Trust yourself and the process of healing. It may take you a long time to fully trust in yourself, but you can start by reassuring yourself that you can do this as long as you believe. You will never lose something if you trust yourself. Over time, you will realize how lighter and confident you will become.
Final Thoughts
We all have insecurities that we try to hide from others, even from ourselves. We hide them because we feel vulnerable every time we think about them. However, the more you keep them, the more they will come back and keep on haunting you until you feel like you couldn’t take it anymore. Remember that they’re just thoughts and you can learn to combat them over time. Follow these steps and you will become more confident in yourself and can leave behind your anxieties and insecurities.